‘Why I became passionate about domestic violence’

Hauwa Rebecca Sodeinde, a gender equality advocate, an author and school owner, speaks to Medinat Kanabe about her passion and what inspired her to be an activist.

 How did you start?

I started by following my passion for teaching. I started working at a British School in Ikoyi, Lagos, after which I started my own school some years later. I went into women and children later and started a community called Hauk community. Here I started seeking help for members suffering from violence, which was our focal point. After a while, we decided to incorporate it into a non governmental organisation to enable other stakeholders to partner and see to the reduction of domestic violence issues, especially against women.

We then started our yearly event in 2015 where we gather women and men together to talk about issues relating to violence and how to help reduce its rate of occurrence.

What are the challenges you faced before you got to where you are today?

Challenges are natural. They come without your permission. And yes, I faced challenges.

What was growing up like?

Growing up was fun. I am the third in a family of six.

I had a younger brother who would beat me at every opportunity. I grew up to learn it was as a result of what he saw in my house where there was always a heat between mum and dad.

What inspired you?

Growing up seeing my mum and dad fight every time taught me not to want to get married. I always wanted a solitary life where I was free to be myself without being any man’s slave. My mentality changed after a short encounter and I decided not to let what happened between my dad and mom control my life.

How do you combine family and everything you do?

It’s been the grace of God. I thank God for the husband he gave me who is always ready to fill in for me whether I am present or absent.

In what ways does your husband support you in achieving these?

He assists in chores….he listens to my silly ideas. He waits for me

to fail and then picks me up again. He doesn’t give up on me and

doesn’t laugh at my mistakes. That, to me, is all the encouragement I need.

Tell us about your foundation

Hauk Foundation was founded with the sole aim of reducing the level of violence in our immediate environment. We teach people to worry not just about themselves but also about their neighbours.

We understand that people going through violence can be silent but will need just one selfless person to help them out of the often time deadly situations.

What about the school?

Hauk Explorers School was founded to cater for the immediate

educational needs of children on the mainland.

After working on the Island, I realised our system of education was way different from what we have on the mainland. Manpower, resources and all; I decided to start something small to attempt bridging this gap.

I also realised most children were left in care of domestic staff and

sometimes end up abused and so I created a safe home where children can stay till late and be picked up. As a primary, we also have a boarding section to give children proper attention.

Who are your role models?

Pastor Sam Adeyemi. After attending his leadership school, my ideals about life and purpose changed completely. I love reading the works of T.D Jakes….they inspire me anytime.

And, of course, my husband who can have faith for Africa. I have never seen his kind and when I look at him I know I still have some work to do.

Do you have any regrets in life?

I used to. But now I know that my mistakes made me who I am today.

What keeps you going?

God.

Where do you see yourself in five years?

I see myself doing what I am doing now on a bigger level. Reaching out to communities; making hope alive.

What advice do you have for people who want to be like you?

No one should want to be like someone else. Everyone should attempt to discover purpose and look up to God for instruction.

What advice do you have for women generally?

Empower yourselves. Do not compete with anyone. Do not lord it over your husband even when you earn more than he does. You are meant to work as one. The devil is out to destroy marriages; don’t let yours be one of such.

What advice do you have for men?

Please realise that the woman’s genetic make-up isn’t the same as yours. A woman can argue all she wants but don’t ever bring yourself to her level. A friend will always say: when a man is in love a new mumu is born. Do not let ego get to you. Your marriage is in your hands.

What about school owners?

Be passionate about what you do. School isn’t about money but about global impact. I look at children I taught years ago all around the world now and I am proud I was able to leave my mark.

first published in The nation of January 8, 2018